Incandescence

Upper Reed Lake, Hatcher Pass Hello to everyone whose reading this! It's been awhile. I feel like I say that with every new post, but this summer I was pushing myself to get out and enjoy some new hikes and also deepen friendships and spend time with family, which meant less time inside writing. But mostly I didn't write not because I didn't have anything to say but because I don't like writing about the messy bits of my life. Often the things I learn the most from are the ones I'm least inclined to post on here. So then I make excuses and keep moving through life with the nagging sensation I should be writing about it. Sometimes I do. And now that the air is crisp and the leaves are have turned and fallen down, I'm feeling more of an itch to write. I've been going through the book A Journey to Victorious Praying: Finding Discipline and Delight in Your Prayer Life by Bill Thrasher. It's made me realize how often I approach my prayers with an agenda. So o...

Over the last few years, there has been a re-shaping of my expectations, a re-arranging of my priorities. Because if I'm being honest, where I am is nowhere close to where I thought I would be. And ultimately, it has been the best thing for me. Hard, at times incredibly hard, but so good too. I've seen growth, and more trust in God because of the valleys. It's easy to forget all of the good things that God has done and see only the negative. This is a far too common pattern in my own life. I think we all have those moments in our lives when we say, "God, why? Why did XYZ happen? Why does it feel like that person is getting everything they want and I'm not?" In the last few months I've been struggling with disappointment over unmet expectations. But then comes the conviction--the moment of realization that 'nothing is promised and every good and perfect gift is from above' (paraphrased from James 1:17)--I have so much to be grateful for, from ...

It's windy outside, and we're sheltering in place. Life is feeling a bit grim and empty, even for an introvert like myself. I'm challenging myself to find new ways to grow as a person. I think we'll all come out of this with a new appreciation for everything we have. I have so much time right now at my disposal--time to write, re-connect with friends. Maybe I'll learn how to dance or brush up on my piano playing. I've been reading the news a lot lately--probably too much--but I keep reading because of the stories of people stepping up in big ways. It is a reminder that there is still good, that there are people willing to do incredible things no matter the cost. T here is hope in the midst of a worldwide pandemic. It is in the midst of the storm that we lean into Christ and trust. I can't imagine getting through it any other way. Jeremiah 17:7 has been my favorite verse for months, and still feels so fitting for this time: "blessed is the one wh...

I had a reminder of God's faithfulness yesterday. Coming home from work I was in a car accident when a driver ran a red light. It was a reminder of the fact that nothing is promised, even our safety. That could be a scary thing, and something like this would normally send me into a tailspin, but all I've felt is peace. In looking at everything, I'm thankful that it wasn't worse. I'm thankful even for 'small' things like a AAA membership that made the details of how and where to get my car towed so much easier. I have peace that God will work out details, has already worked out the details, and there isn't any reason for me to stress over it. That's not my normal reaction. Usually I sit and stew and think over all of the details, all the ways things could go wrong, and spin out of control. This morning I'm sitting at home drinking coffee and working through insurance and all the myriad details that come with something like this, and fin...